Picky, Picky

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I remember watching “When Harry Met Sally” a lot in college.  It was so funny because I had a male best friend and I couldn’t imagine ever dating him.  But the thing that really sticks out to me is how crazy I thought Meg Ryan was when she was ordering her meal.  How dare she change the menu that someone had worked so hard to put together.  I remember thinking that if she didn’t like it the way it was intended to be prepared then she should choose something else.  It’s not that hard to eat at a restaurant, really!

Then today I realized that I am Meg Ryan.  I always adjust menus items.  I’m notorious for asking for dressing on the side, none of this or that, changing the preparation from fried to grilled, etc.  I figure I’m the customer and food should be the way I like it as long as I’m polite about requesting changes.  I love to eat at restaurants but I know that most of the stuff straight off the menu is not the way I want to eat it. 

I wasn’t always so bold about my food choices though.  My anxiety used to flare up before and think that the waiter or chef would spit in my food because of all my changes.  I always ended up picking things out or trying not to eat the thing I didn’t want just because it came with my order (ie. Home fries with eggs or fries with my burger). 

One day at a WW meeting someone said something that intrigued me.  “The waiter is your friend.  Just ask nicely and they usually have no problem adjusting orders.”  This was a novel concept to me after watching too many tv shows and movies with disgruntled waiters/waitresses.  One day I just had to suck it up and do it.  I asked for egg whites instead of regular eggs and no homefries when we went out for breakfast one saturday.  Surprisingly the waiter smiled and said “Any other changes you’d like?”  I was shocked and pleasantly surprised.  That was probably one of the best meals I had ever had out since starting my Weight Loss Journey because I had stuck up for what I wanted to eat instead of just eating it (besides the food was delicious :) ). 

Now I can go into a restaurant, look at the menu, and make decisions based on what the menu says and also the changes I want to make to it.  I still sometimes worry what others think about all my changes and substitutions but I feel empowered for taking control of my eating.  So what if I’m “Picky”.

Question: Do you make substitutions at restaurants?  Do you care what others think?

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Fine line

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I’ve been reading a lot of blogs lately and there seems to be a fine line between what people think is appropriate when it comes to thinking about food and what is obsession.  It’s difficult to determine where this line is; and it may be different for everyone.

Lately I’ve received a lot of compliments about how committed I am to my weight loss and exercise.  People think I’m super committed to my healthy eating and exercising all the time.  The truth is I am, most of the time, but its not of my own resolve.  I guess I should explain.  I have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and when I get focused on something I can get kind of obsessed about it.  So for me with food and exercise I guess you can say I’m obsessed. 

That means I plan my food out every day (and usually the day before).  I make meal menus and grocery lists.  I plan out my exercise for the week and for the month if I can.  I wear a heart rate monitor so I know exactly how many calories I’m burning.  I push myself with exercise to challenge myself.  All of these things help me to stay focused.

But it can have its disadvantages.  Sometimes I get anxious if my plans don’t workout.  I used to panic when I had so carefully planned my meals or exercise and something would come up that would inhibit those plans.  Through therapy I’ve gotten better about not panicking if my plans don’t work but I’m still stressed sometimes.  I used to push myself too hard with exercise sometimes to the point of exhaustion.  My back surgery really helped me to learn that I can’t push too hard or I can get injured again and that’s the last thing I want.  And I sometimes drive Hunni and other loved ones crazy with how super focused I can be on health and wellness.  He loves to eat healthy with me but when I insist on specifics he gets a bit annoyed.

I must say I’ve gotten better with all of this over the years.  I’ve been able to relax especially when it comes to situations where I can’t plan and just enjoy the time (ie. vacations and weddings).  I think I’ve learned enough to be sensible in these situation and not be too obsessed.  It was a big deal for me to not have a panick attack or end up with an Eating Disorder which is where I was headed.  I’ve learned to love life a little and realize if I enjoy ice cream one day the world is not going to end. 

I just wanted to get this out there because my fine line between health and obsession is different from some of yours and I don’t want to appear phony.  I’m not perfect…I just have a diagnosis :-)

Question: What is your fine line between healthy and obessesion?  How to you keep from getting obsessed about food and exercise?

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